Competencies Only Become Clear in Behaviour

Competencies.

A word you hear in development conversations, assessments, job profiles and leadership programmes. Communication. Collaboration. Persuasion. Leadership. But what do they really mean?

A competency only becomes interesting when you can see it in behaviour. Not in what you intend to do. Not in what you are able to do on paper. But in what you actually do when the situation becomes difficult.

• When your advice does not land.
• When a colleague does not move with you.
• When a meeting gets stuck.
• Or when you need to set a boundary and still want to keep the relationship strong.

At Bureau Zuidema, we therefore look at competencies as visible behaviour. Behaviour that fits your goal, the situation and the people you work with. Only then does development become concrete: which behaviour helps you create more impact?

In brief

• A competency is the way you use your knowledge, skills, attitude and behaviour in a work situation.
• Competencies become visible in high-pressure situations: resistance, collaboration, leadership, difficult conversations or moments of tension.
• Soft skills are often the building blocks. Competencies show how you use those building blocks in the context of your work.
• You develop competencies through awareness, practice, reflection and trying out new behaviour.
• At Bureau Zuidema, we look at competencies as influence behaviour: behaviour that helps you achieve results while keeping the relationship strong.

That is the Zuidema view of influence: choosing behaviour that helps you achieve your goal and maintain the relationship.

What do we mean by competencies?

A competency is the way you use your knowledge, skills, attitude and behaviour in a work situation.

Most professionals understand that in theory. The more interesting question is: when can you actually see a competency in practice?

Not in a task list or job profile, but in behaviour. For example, when your advice does not land, a colleague does not move with you, a conversation gets stuck or you need to set a boundary without damaging the relationship.

That is why Bureau Zuidema looks at competencies as behaviour you can develop. Not: “Do you have this competency or not?” But: which behaviour helps you have more impact in this situation?

Why competencies only count when they show up in behaviour

You can be a strong communicator in a meeting that runs smoothly, but get stuck as soon as someone does not accept your advice.

You can be collaborative as long as everyone moves with you, but become sharp when interests start to clash.

That is why we look at competencies as behavioural choices.

We use the Influence Model® for this. Do you use Push energy, where you give direction, make your point clearly and set boundaries? Or does the situation ask for Pull energy, where you connect, explore and get the other person moving?

There is no single right style. The real skill is switching consciously to the style the situation needs.

A competency is not a fixed label. It is behaviour you choose, practise and refine.

Competencies, soft skills and skills: what is the difference?

Competencies, skills and soft skills are often used interchangeably. Still, there is a clear difference.

A skill is something you can do in a concrete way, such as summarising, presenting or giving feedback.

A soft skill is a personal or social skill, such as listening, collaborating or communicating assertively.

A competency is broader. It means using your knowledge, skills, attitude and behaviour effectively in a specific work situation.

In short: soft skills are often the building blocks. Competencies show how you use those building blocks when it really matters.

Want to learn more about soft skills such as listening, giving feedback or assertiveness?

Personal competencies and professional competencies

Competencies are often divided into personal competencies and professional competencies.

Personal competencies are about what you bring as a person. Think of self-reflection, empathy, reliability, resilience and self-confidence.

Professional competencies are about how you perform in your role. Think of advising, leading, negotiating, presenting, collaborating or taking the lead.

In practice, these two types often overlap.

An advisor with strong expertise also needs self-confidence to present critical advice with clarity. A manager who wants to give direction also needs empathy to connect with what a team member needs. And a project leader who wants to achieve results needs collaborative competencies to bring different interests together.

So you are not only working on skills. You are also working on beliefs, tension, patterns and the way you show up in contact with others.

Which competencies become visible in difficult situations?

You do not mainly see competencies when everything runs smoothly. You see them when tension arises.

• A colleague does not move with you.
• A client asks critical questions.
• A meeting gets stuck.
• You need to set a boundary.

In those moments, your automatic behaviour becomes visible.

• Do you start explaining harder?
• Do you withdraw?
• Do you keep connecting when the situation needs direction?
• Or do you set boundaries without first exploring what the other person needs?

That is why a list of competencies only becomes useful when you translate it into visible behaviour.

Not: “Am I a strong communicator?”
But: “What do I do when my message does not land?”

Not: “Can I collaborate?”
But: “How do I deal with different interests, pressure or resistance?”

Common competencies that become visible in challenging work situations include communication, collaboration, persuasion, self-reflection, leadership, advising, presenting, negotiating, dealing with resistance and setting boundaries.

Want to see which behaviour belongs to each competency?

Read the full competency list with examples of visible behaviour.

Which competency matters most in your role?

It makes sense that an advisor faces different challenges than a team leader. And a professional at the start of their career has different development questions than someone with twenty years of experience.

You can find your most important competency faster with these four questions.

What do you want to achieve?

Do you want to create buy-in, make decisions faster, resolve conflict, give better advice or lead with more clarity?

Your goal determines which competency matters most.

Where does it get difficult?

Look at concrete situations. Meetings. One-to-one conversations. Presentations. Negotiations. Difficult conversations. Advisory processes.

You do not develop a competency “in general”. You develop it because you want to create more impact in a specific situation.

Who are you dealing with?

Do you work with colleagues, senior management, clients, team members, experts or stakeholders?

The same competency may ask for different behaviour with a different person.

What do you automatically do under pressure?

Do you explain harder? Persuade more? Please others? Avoid the conversation? Try to control the situation? Shut down?

Under pressure, your automatic reactions become visible. And that is exactly where development starts.

Developing competencies: from insight to different behaviour

Developing competencies starts with insight. But it does not stop there.

Knowing what you are good at, or what you want to improve, is valuable. But in your work, what counts is what you do when things become tense.

That is why you do not develop a competency by only reading about it. You develop it by making behaviour concrete, practising, exploring feedback and applying new behaviour in real work situations.

So make your development point small and visible.

Not: “I want to communicate better.”
But: “I want to state my point more clearly in meetings.”

Not: “I want to become firmer.”
But: “I want to set my boundary before I take on too much.”

Then you look at the effect.

• What came across clearly?
• Where did you lose the other person?
• When did you start pushing harder, pleasing or withdrawing?

This is how you discover which behaviour works and which behaviour asks for a different choice.

Want to work on competency development step by step?

Read the full approach to developing competencies.

From competency list to influence in practice

Competencies are not the end point. They are the starting point.

A way to look more sharply at your behaviour, your effect and your opportunities to grow.

Do you want to communicate more effectively, collaborate better, create more buy-in or stand stronger in difficult conversations?

Then you do not start with the perfect list of competencies.

You start with insight into what you do, what that creates in others and which behavioural choices you have.

In the Personal Influence Programme, you explore your own behaviour, practise with recognisable work situations and learn to switch between Influence Styles. This way, competencies are no longer words on paper. They become behaviour you use when it matters.